You hold onto hope, because that is what you do when you love someone.
Instead of screaming- “that’s where people like that should be” …
we are imagining all of the places that they have the potential and talent to be one day.
We don’t see the awkward, tired, malnourished human who has made countless dangerous, selfish choices.
We see who they once were. We see the funny, intelligent, witty, talented person that is buried somewhere deep beneath the surface…
This is the dilemma we find ourselves in when we love an addict.
*Applying the 12 steps to my life as Brittany: the enabler, codependent, someone who happens to love an alcoholic- has been a tough journey for me, but I do understand the value of setting necessary boundaries in this relationship; for me, and for him.
*Applying the 12 steps to my life as Brittany: the addict in long-term Recovery from drugs, alcohol, anger issues, and trauma- has been very tough, but navigating has been ongoing, and growth pretty consistent.
With family, it is difficult to love from behind the safety net of set boundary lines.
It is difficult to watch them struggle. It is hard to keep my feet planted and not rush over to help them up.
Realistically, I understand I am one woman, who by the grace of God has the opportunity to live and learn, one day at a time.
I am one person who cannot control the actions of others.
I am just a lady who knows that the only actions and behavior that I am responsible for…
is my own.
So for right now, I will allow my heart to play a little bit of catch up in understanding the facts & truth that my brain already knows.
There are consequences for the actions and choices that we make.
If we cannot allow people to experience their own consequences….
they won’t ever have the chance to begin their own journey.
Just. For. Today.
Thanks, Al-Anon.