Just Hoping To Help Another Person.

helping-others

The husband blog series.

I am truly blown away by the amount of positive feedback I have received from this these posts. Originally the idea came when after seeing so many couples struggling and hearing about spouses at their wit’s end who were completely ready to give up on their loved one.

I am not an advice giver, but more of an experience share-er.

We always hear about codependency and enabling but we don’t always hear directly from the enabler or the codependent. Their voice is not always heard.

Their voice is important too.

In my case, my husband was a victim who unknowingly stumbled upon a hot mess of a young woman who hid her demons behind masks pretty well for a while. He ended up falling in love with the glimpses of the ‘real’ me in between my using. (Personally, I think he’s crazy for sticking around, but most of all, compassionate for helping me up so many times.)

I thought that by sharing our experiences with others it could help them to feel a little bit less alone in it all. It can feel like it will never get better, and progress is never going to pick up speed. I wanted people to hear a real-life story, from two regular people who aren’t any more special than the next person. Just two humans trying to figure this thing out.

In my opinion, there really aren’t a set of ‘right’ answers to how you are ‘suppose to’ handle the conflict that addiction brings into a relationship. There are healthy, positive things that have been proven helpful to many.

So just remember, if you find yourself in this situation- the best thing that you can do is reach out for support, learn and educate yourself and make sure that you take care of you through this whole process.

The addict has to do their own work while you do yours.

The work that is required that you do together HAS to be between two people who are working and learning as individuals.

No one plans for dealing with addiction. Most are blindsided and are left to navigate the deep, treacherous waters on their own.

I am just trying to help where I might be able to.

And the best part about coming out the other side is knowing that there is nothing that will be strong enough to tear you apart. You have made it through one of the toughest scenarios that a couple will ever face, together.

Keep pushing through, and don’t give up on each other!

(If you haven’t read the husband series and would like to, click this link: http://t.co/mTD7EYiJf4)

 

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