Husband thoughts part 4- Phases, waves and meetings.

***On Celebrate Recovery meetings:

So after being sober for awhile she started going to meetings every week.
Every Thursday night.

I felt like they weren’t going to do much for her, but I also had no issue with her going to them. I did start noticing small changes here and there.

She started reading a lot more.
Other things changed too.

I feel like her Recovery came in waves. It started hard- so hard that we didn’t know if SHE was going to live or die.

After a certain point, she was alive and trying but we didn’t know if our relationship was going to make it through all of the mood swings and anger- depression and sadness.

After the meetings- more changes came. She told me she was getting to know who she was again and that it had been a long time since she really knew who that was.

***Did the meetings help?

Yes. They gave her a place to learn more about her addiction and a place to learn how to regulate her emotions and vocalize some of how she was feeling and what she was going through with people who she did not feel so defensive with. It was great for me! 🙂

***How did you support her going to the weekly meetings and other recovery activities?

Always asked how they went. I always wanted to know how she felt when she got home and how things went. I also made it a point to ask what is coming up or what homework she had to do that week. I had no idea what most of it meant, and honestly- just wanted her to know that I was proud of her for going at all.

***Do you think that meetings are a good idea for anyone in Recovery + relationship?

Yes because we were not in a place where we could afford counseling and it provided education and a lot of other therapeutic stuff.

***What would you say to others who are trying to act as ‘supporters’ during this process?
Stay patient. This all sounds wonderful and easy on screen, but the reality is—
it was a difficult period of time for us. I had to keep reminding myself that she had a lot of self-discovery to work through and she just needed my love and support. She needed to have that positive in her life- she knew that I was not going anywhere-no matter what.

This took more time too than I had imagined. It takes a long time to uncover a person’s deepest hurts and for that person to learn how to live life sober.

Stay patient and enjoy all of the victories along the way.

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